As most of you know, we have hit yet another bump in the road.
If you have been following our adoption/visa process, you know that we have been looking towards September as the end of the tunnel--based on what we were told about our paper work for Abby and Lily's I-130/visas.
Well, we have now been told that our foster care is not strong enough to prove legal custody... which was the reason that September was our end of tunnel month. Without foster care as our legal custody, we have to use our adoption decree (which we got this year) and go two years from that date... so sometime in 2018 we could start the I-130/visa process.
Honestly, I was expecting to have a problem with the visas and paperwork, because nothing has gone smoothly thus far, but was not expecting this big of a problem.
So at this point, there are two ways that people react. One is to say, "We just need to pray, cause God will take care of this bump in the road, and they will be home soon." The other is to have a shocked look of silence and just say, "I'll be praying for you."
The second is where I am at right now. It is not that I do not have the faith to believe God is bigger than this "bump," but that I have faith that believes in a God who uses "bumps" to make us more into His image. My God would allow something like this to happen for a purpose, and if we trust Him, we may not see what it is now, but when we look back, it will be certain that He was at work the whole time.
My dilemma right now is trying to pray for God's will, but also pouring out my desire that the girls can come home soon, while knowing that God could be at work either way.
This might be His way of showing one last time that it was ALL Him. He gets all the glory, if the girls come home soon, cause at this point it would take an act of God to overcome this situation.
This also might be God's way of saying, "I still have something I'm doing in you, in Cambodia." Kelsi and I felt very strongly that He was calling us home, and that is why we made all these plans, but God has a way of changing our plans... a lot. And every time He has changed our plans, it has been for our benefit (e.g. changing our plan to only be in Cambodia for nine months).
As I go to sleep tonight, the sun will rise on Kelsi and the girls--it is Friday there. If I wake up and have not heard any news, it will be another weekend of waiting. I told Kelsi, I will probably fall apart if that happens--just being honest. This has been one of the hardest weeks ever emotionally for us, and I am trying to just go about my days with the peace that passes understanding, but also completely in turmoil, and only hanging on by the grace of God and His continual support. I miss my wife. I miss my daughters. I want to be with them... now.
Pray. Pray for God's will. Pray that our desires match His and we will be reunited soon. Pray for peace in this storm.
Lastly, I want to share a song that came on while I was praying in the car on the way to school yesterday... I was in one of those about to fall apart moments, when God took over my "Random All Songs" playlist and put this on.
In My Love by Phil Wickham
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9nT0hA5PG4
